Thursday, May 04, 2006


Commenters at the Ace of Spades Headquarters spared no effort researching Valerie Plame's astonishing abilities and have come up with a list of little-known facts about this spy extraordinaire:

Want to know why Khaddafy gave up his WMD program?

Two words: Valerie Plame.


And, if not for Bush, he would've ALSO settled on a single spelling of his name by now.

F'n moonbat bastard
-by MikeSC

Valerie Plame directed the CIA coup that unseated Mohammed Mossadegh--ten years before she was born.
-by Hondo

Valerie Plame has all of the critical hits tables from Rolemaster memorized.
-by too embarassed to admit name

CIA code name: Desperate Housewife

When passing through the gate at Langley AFB, the photo she used for ID was the one printed in Vanity Fair.

Plame was first approached by the CIA when a supervisor saw Joe Wilson and realized they could use an agent who'd sleep with anything.

Plame once placed a rowdy country club member on Double Secret Probation. She put Neidermeyer on it because he was a sneaky little $h*t just like her.

Bond has Q to help him. Plame has GQ to help her.

Plame isn't in Covert Ops for the CIA, she's in Overt Ops for the DNC.
-by bbeck

ger? Joe Wilson nearly killed her!
-by anonymous

Little-known fact: "The Fifth Element" was based on a highly, classified, top-secret mission involving Valerie Plame, aliens and huge space-yachts.
-by dogstar

Let me try: Valerie Plame had Osama bin Laden cornered at gunpoint, but then Bush blew her cover and Osama got away.
-by Sandy Burger


I've got one:

Valerie was leading an elite team of commandos, one of whom was Coleen Rowley, into North Korea to assasinate Kim Jong Il. But Bush went and blew her cover before she could finish the mission.
-by Bart

Valerie Plame could kick my ass any day of the week, she did most of the work I get attributed for, until Bushitler McChimpysmirk ruined it all!
-by Sean Connery 007

Now it can be told, the CIA operative I ferried into Cambodia in Christmas of 1968 was Valerie Plame. The hat she gave me was a cute little number with a veil in front, in a fetching shade of Mauve.
-by John Kerry

It's not widely known, but Valerie Plame had infiltrated her way up through the ranks of the Iraqi insurgency. The day before she was to meet with Zarqawi himself (at which point she would throw a net over him and they'd be swooped up by a helicopter piloted by Richard Clarke), Bush blew her cover and the operation was called off.
-by sandy burger

Valerie Plame was this close to springing shut a honey trap she had laid for a certain high-level ex-KGB premier whose name ryhmes with "Newton". With only 48 more hours, she would have had this Russian blackmailed into a Anglo-Russki pact to overrun Iran and convert Persia to a Ali Baba-themed amusement park.

But Smirky McPretzelchoker blew her cover and her entire network was rolled up and shot at sunrise. No flying cars, no flying carpets. Thanks, Smirky.
-by Spongeworthy

The crime fighting team of Valerie Plame, Joe Wilson, and their dog, Coleen Rowley, were working on a plan to stop Hurricane Katrina. Bush blew their cover and the hurricane devistated Louisiana.

Coleen Rowley: Ruff!
-by Bart

Valerie Plame was investigating a plot by mafia assassins, bent on killing a passenger who's a witness in protective custody, to let loose a crate full of deadly snakes on an airplane. But Bush leaked her identity, the leads dried up, and now we all fly in fear.
-by Sandy Burger

Valerie Plame would have made Christopher Reeve walk but Bush the liar lied so that she had to stop!
-by tubino's a**

Valerie Plame and Ann Coulter first debuted as the rock duo Nelson.
-by mister whizzer

Valerie Plame once made a million dollars in real estate. Ask her how!
-by Shawn but not lowercased shawn

Valerie Plame's X-Ray Specs actually work.
-by sandy burger

Valerie Plame was part of a secret group which aimed to become a shadow government. They infiltrated the US government, especially the State Dept. and the CIA, weeding out resistance and turning parts of these agencies against the American people and their chosen representatives. They manipulated the public with propaganda and manufactured truth.

What? Why isn't anybody laughing?
-by sandy burger

Many more to be found in the thread listed!

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